Monday, April 17, 2006

Very Sad Day!

We put Buddy to sleep today. It's amazing how much a hole a dog's absence can leave in your heart.

Friday, when I left to go to Atlanta, Buddy was doing OK, but was starting to pant signifcantly. By the time Mark got home Friday, he was starting to drag his left rear leg and the left side of his face was drooping a little. When I got home last night, he was having trouble getting up and down because of his hip/leg, and the panting was more pronounced. His abdomen was swollen as well.

I made the decision last night that it was probably time even though he seemed to be still eating and was happy to see me. It was just so hard watching him try to move. Then last night, he stayed in my room most of the night and was not sleeping much. He seemed to be watching me. I kept listening to him pant and then stop - I would check to see if he was still breathing - he would be laying there watching me.

So I got up this morning and Buddy was in the hall but didn't want to get up. He was watching but didn't want to move. And the way he was holding his leg, I knew it was hurting.

I couldn't stay with him - I needed to leave him. But Mark went with me to take him to the vet, and had to lift him into the truck - last week he was able to jump up on his own. Yes, I knew that I was making the right decision, but it didn't make it any easier. And I hated leaving him! But I had to take my mom to the doctor and I don't think I could have stayed anyway. That part really makes me feel guilty, but I've had so many losses in the last few years, I couldn't be there for my puppy! I couldn't handle it! I hate that part!


Bethy said...

So sorry Maggie. Losing a pet is one of the hardest things to go through.

I'm thinking of you.

debra said...

My heartfelt sorry to you Maggie. I went through the same thing with my blacklab Toby. Losing a family member is one of the worst things we have to endure. I'm sure he's in a better place now (hugs)

Meg said...

That is the worst decision to have to make. I'm so sorry for you and your family and Buddy. ((hugs))

Judyy said...

I'm so sorry it's taken me a couple of days to catch up with this, Maggie. Poor Buddy and poor you--it's heartbreaking. I know just what you mean--in your head, you know it was totally the right thing to do for Buddy, but in your heart...well, you know. Hugs, pal.

Canay said...

I understand the pain you must feel. We have always had dogs and unfortunately losing them is never easy. Buddy was lucky to have such a loving owner.